The One With Housing & Parenting Thoughts

On Parenting:

Lately parenting has not been a walk in the park. Lately there has been a lot of strife in our home between all of the children. Even 18 month old Katie gets in on the action by pestering 3 year old Erich. How does she do this? By getting in his face, trying to kiss him while he's screaming "NOOOOO" or laying her head on him or taking his favorite stuffed animal and then running when he comes close. Yah... even SHE can cause troubles.

So I've been frustrated, to say the least. All the bickering, snotty talk, even hitting (which is very unlike my children) has broken the straw on the camel's back and I struggle with why. I decided that I could revert to punitive parenting and see if that would just stop the actions, but then realized what does that teach them? Obviously whatever is bothering my children is a heart issue. I cannot change their hearts by spanking them. I cannot change their hearts by taking away video games and sending them to their rooms. It boils down to the fact that nothing that *I* do CAN change their hearts. They have to choose to change their hearts. Sure, a spanking would get them to control themselves (when they around me anyway), but it really doesn't teach them anything other than how to be more sneaky about being naughty.... or like my brother likes to say "how not to get caught."

Parenting needs to work from the inside out... we must work on their hearts and then it will show on the outside. So I need to work on their insides. I need to listen when they need to talk. I need to help them to hear themselves when they start talking in a mean way so that they can recognize it and stop it in it's tracks. I need to keep talking to them about being pleasing to the Lord and most of all show them in my actions what that means. Life has been stressful in the past year and lately it has come out in my wanting to be by myself a lot and not interacting with the children as much as I should ... and certainly not all in a positive way. So I guess what it boils down to is me changing my insides in order to help them change their insides....

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Ok... a not so deep subject!!

We placed an offer on an awesome house. It was rejected even tho it was only $5000 less than the asking price.

The day after we placed an offer on that house another house came on the market in the town I really wanted to be in. I was a little disappointed, but figured that wherever the Lord wants us is where we'll be. Anyway... we decided to look at it after the other offer was rejected. It needs remodeling for sure, but the structure is good & it is liveable the way it is. :) It has 1.5 acres w/ a big pond that has wildlife in it (an otter was swimming when we got there there... there were also ducks & of course, frogs) The house has 4 bedrooms, an art room, a laundry room, a family room, a living room, a kitchen, & a dining room. It's a late 1800's home.

Now we wait... and see. I hope they accept our offer and all this goes through... but I guess I should just keep praying that God's will be done.

The One With Parenting Thoughts

More parenting thoughts...

I've read a lot of parenting books in my time. I'm always looking and searching for new ideas, new thoughts, new ways of dealing with the day to day things we encounter. And it seems that as soon as I figure out how to deal with "x", they start doing "y" and I have to start all over again.

This move has thrown us all over the edge. We are currently staying in a rental that belongs to my parents. I'm constantly on edge because I'm afraid the children will mark up walls or floors or damage something in some way. That's the biggest reason I dislike renting! I also feel so in limbo and unsettled because I know we're not staying here and I don't know where we're going to end up. So I'm on edge and I admit, a wee bit grumpy and overwhelmed. The children are feeding off of that and we're having to deal with things I've never really had to deal with before. There is a lot of fighting, more disrespect, many meltdowns, crying, fussing, arguing w/ me... and the list could go on. To be honest I'd love to just spank it all out of them... make them behave by making them fearful. It sounds easier in so many ways than trying to deal with the inner heart and emotions of each individual child and myself. But I won't do that because I know that in the long run that only teaches them to stifle their feelings and not learn to deal with them in the right way.

There needs to be a book written "How to Parent Your Children Through a Move and Limbo Stage and Stay Sane"

The One With Open & Closed Doors.

I don't know if God literally opens and closes doors... but yesterday it sure seemed that way to us.

We planned to go to 3 houses yesterday and were praying that we would get a clear answer on whether we should make an offer on one. The first house we visited we didn't think we'd like, but decided to weigh all our options. We loved it... When we arrived the couple who owns it was just leaving. They were an older couple who have lived there for about 40+/- years and raised their family there. The husband is on oxygen and she had to help him into the truck, so it doesn't look like he's well. They were both friendly & got big smiles on their faces when they saw all the kids. The wife said "I lit a nice fire for you in kitchen" and she had. It was so cozy in there. They obviously took great care of the house, but it is too much house for them now, so they are selling it. The house needs some updating, but it is so nice! It has so much character & definitely fits us. But we had been to the second house before and knew that we loved the land. We planned to go inside, check out the house & make a decision (we nixed the third house after we saw exactly where it was located)

We arrived at the second house and were in awe, as usual, of the land. Tho we both noticed that we hated the drive & wondered how it would be in the winter or late at night. We arrived in the pouring cold rain. Our realtor had just updated her keys (they are computerized these days. lol) And no matter what she did the door wouldn't open. So we all left w/ the plan to come back after she figured it out. We came back to the house & the key STILL wouldn't work. We have been in the house before. It's a doublewide on a full foundation. We just thought that getting back inside would give us a good feel of whether it fit us or not.

So we left and decided to drive by the first house one more time. As we were 1/2 way between the houses Matt and I looked at each other and said "Do you think God would literally close a door?" at the same time! LOL! We hadn't even been talking about that...

We came home discussed it all out and decided to place an offer on the first house. We'll see how it goes from here... but the offer will be made tonight and then it's a waiting game. If it doesn't work out we'll just keep looking :)

The One With the Move

Well, the end of our home selling saga comes to an end as of tomorrow at 4:30 pm (probably a wee bit later than 4:30... but that's when the end begins. ;) ) Our closing has finally arrive and I'm thrilled!!

We moved into my parents home a few weekends ago. The rental isn't quite done yet... just a few things left to do before we get the OK to actually move in. However, all of my stuff is there (or in storage). I've already unpacked the kitchen and have gotten most of the boxes put into the right rooms. I unpacked a bit in the living room and clothes. We're so close to being moved in. I can't wait! Every day that I've been over here at the house I've gone for a traips in the woods w/ the children. We've found all kinds of fun nature things, heard lots of different birds & found lots of deer markings. The kids are really enjoying this and so am I. I am so glad we chose to move back here.

No news on the home buying front. Frankly, I don't even want to THINK about moving again anytime soon. It was a huge ordeal... We have two homes that we are interested in, but we're not pushing anything right now. I'm too tired to care at the moment.

The MOVING One!

I haven't actually gotten excited about this move yet. I've been more overwhelmed w/ it all. Who knew that packing w/ 5 little ones wouldn't be a walk in the park? LOL!! I have had half filled boxes knocked over, glasses broken, fully packed/waiting for tape boxes unpacked by a certain 1 y/o, toys unpacked and played with. Not to mention that as I'm packing the laundry is piling up. It's almost as bad as shoveling in a snow storm. LOL!

But I'm pretty excited that we're actually finally moving. Still no actually closing date. They are saying "end of the month/beginning of next" still. I hate not knowing. *sigh*

We're doing whatever we can to put an offer on a place in VT. It has 10 acres of woods... and the house is a little bigger than our current home. The house isn't actually ideal, but we love the land. So we'll see what happens with that.

The Overwhelmed One

I'm overwhelmed. Very overwhelmed. I can't stop thinking about the appraisal and whether the house passed. I can't stop thinking about how much the electrical issues will cost us (have to get the box replaced by a licensed electrician) Can't stop thinking about how expensive houses in VT are. Can't stop wondering if we'll ever find the right place for us. Can't stop feeling jealous and frustrated by families who make more $ and can afford more, but complain about having no money when we have no debt yet still cannot afford a house in VT that isn't either a prefab or really old one needing lots of work. Can't stop feeling stressed. I'd really like to hide out for the next 6 weeks and let DH do it all. I can't even start packing yet because I realtor said to wait til she said so... and I don't even know where to start w/ the packing. I don't want to think about dealing w/ the actual move... yet I want to be moved asap.

BLAAAAHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

O.V.E.R.W.H.E.L.M.E.D.

The One With An Offer

There's been so much happening lately that I've been super busy.

We received and accepted an offer on our home on Feb 20th. We had our inspection on Feb 28th & will have the appraisal done tomorrow, March 5th. If all goes well, we should be closing in April.

We've also found a home that we like in VT. We're praying/thinking about it. We have an appt on Friday w/ a loan specialist to get pre-approved and if we can do it, I think we'll make an offer. *gulp* I'm so nervous & excited.

I have a list that I'm keeping of all the "coincidences" of recent happenings. I will share them when I have time. For now I need to get up w/ the kiddos and start cleaning!! The last cleaning before the final cleaning! WOOHOO!!!